One of the easiest ways to connect with, and support, a person with dementia (PwD) is through music. In fact, studies have shown that music therapy in its many forms can provide powerful benefits to a person’s well-being and make a positive impact on cognitive function overall.
I certainly know the first of these is true for me. All through the Covid lockdown, I created personal playlists every week so that I’d have new songs to listen to in my preferred music genres. I would listen to music every single day, and it helped a lot. I actually still listen to music every day!
In my sister’s case, I saw this same mood lifting take place every time we would play her favorite Fleetwood Mac or Madonna albums for her. The effect was often dramatic. She would go from being angry and yelling at everyone around her to happily singing or humming along to one of her favorite songs. So music became an important tool for me as a caregiver. If there was a way to soothe Peggy’s anxiety and agitation, I would always try to provide that.
Another potential benefit? Lowering a PwD’s stress level can keep cognitive deficits from widening, and familiar music is a proven way to do that. From the journal article linked above:
It’s not just any music that has a regenerative effect on the brain, though. Familiar and favourite music has been shown to have the biggest impact on the way we feel, and is closely linked with memory and emotions. This is because listening to our favourite songs releases feel-good hormones that give us a sense of pleasure. Curated music playlists of favourite music could be the key in helping us deal with the stress of everyday life.
I remember one day, Peggy and I were sitting in her bedroom in memory care, listening to ’80s music on iHeart Radio when “Kiss” by Prince came on. I said to her, “C’mon Peggy, let’s chair dance!” And you know what? We did. Peggy had a big smile on her face and kept that beat for the entire song. Part of it was probably the notion of doing something “normal” for once, like dancing, even if it was in our chairs. Peggy had always been a big Prince fan, and I still am, so it was totally in character for us to rock out to him. (Not to mention it’s a great song, in my opinion.)
Even unfamiliar music can sometimes have quite a positive effect on a PwD, studies show, and I was happy to discover that this was true for my sister. It gave me the opportunity to play some new music for her from time to time—and, to my surprise, it was even her idea.
During one of my other visits, Peggy and I sat in her room listening to one of the ’80s “mix tapes” I’d made for her. When it came to an end, she turned to me and said, “I want to hear something that you listen to.” I thought to myself, “Hmmm. What could I choose? What should I choose?”
Nothing appropriate immediately leapt to mind, probably because I listen to goth/industrial music, for the most part, and Peggy was never really into it. Plus, all of my favorite songs are angsty, or about death, or about feeling angsty about death, so it took me a little time to identify a few song choices that I knew wouldn’t upset her. Eventually I hit upon a track by Kid Moxie that ticked all the boxes—a female vocalist, not distressing in any way, and I really thought Peggy would like it.
So I put the ear buds in Peggy’s ears and played Kid Moxie’s track “Shine” for her. She started to bounce to it, and then she started to hum it! I couldn’t hear the actual song because of the ear buds, but Peggy’s humming was recognizably “Shine.” Her lifelong musicianship kicked in—it was almost like she was sight reading the song. It was a really special moment.
So, my advice to all caregivers is this: Find the music your PwD likes best, and make it available to them however you can. Put those tunes on for them to hear during your visits, and listen (and maybe chair dance) together. And make sure their bedroom has a way to play that music, so that other caregivers can help them listen. I think you’ll be happy with the results. It’s sure to bring a smile—and if you’re lucky, maybe even some humming or singing as well.
